Mommy Desperate

Finally realizing that her love life has faltered since her 2005 divorce, Jessica Simpson has a new plan for making babies. Without a steady straight man in her life, Jessica has made arrangements with her bff, hair extraordinaire Ken Paves.

Jessica and her mane man have made a baby pact that both are apparently willing to act on. Jessica told the ladies of The View, "If I don't have kids by the time I'm 40, my best friend Ken Paves and I are going to have children!"

At least we know their potential offspring will all be perfectly coifed!