Bronzed and Bullied

The world's recent obsession with pop culture has reached society's elite. Although many academics claim they are not interested in the lives of Hollywood's most famous, their knowledge of celebrities never fails to surprise me. The latest civil servant to publicly admit her knowledge of La La land's darlings is Judge Damian G. Murray.

The presiding judge who deemed Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi "annoying" is now calling the reality star a "Lindsay Lohan wannabe." Arrested on July 30 for being intoxicated in public, Snooki was fined $500 and ordered to perform community service after pleading guilty on Wednesday.

Lecturing the too-tanned Snooki, Judge Murray said, "Going through life rude, profane, obnoxious and self-indulgent - that's not the way you want to live your life. Hopefully this incident will impress upon you that there are consequences to your actions." Spoken like a true Jersey Shore fan, don't you think?